my testimony

Sunday 3th was a testimonial Sunday...however i was so scare to go up and talk...so hopefully i can bare my testimony here

it all happened on Thursday 31th January. i was doing some research about Meadow mountain massacre that the Mormon has involved in so i can show the correct information to the guy who talk bad about Mormon people. i have started a blog on the Mormonism that explain and fight back anti-Mormon documents.

but when i had all information i needed (this happened in the morning), i prayed to the Heavenly Father to guide me and help me write everything correctly.

but the answer for me is "No"  ,the answer is in D&C23:4 (for thou also art under no condemnation, and thy calling is to exhortation, and to strengthen the church; and thou art not as yet called to preach before the world. Amen.)i was confused with His answer so i asked the Lord again "why, Lord why ?"   and His answer is that the person will not listen and come to water of baptise.

and i know that the Lord was kind to me in the scripture it said that He called me here not to blame me, He encourage me to serve the church, but it just not time for me to teach.

i was so sad...

in the afternoon. i prayed to asked the Lord again and His answer was so clear
 (D&C63:7-12 ). 
7 And he that seeketh ^asigns shall see ^bsigns, but not unto salvation.

 8 Verily, I say unto you, there are those among you who seek signs, and there have been such even from the beginning;

 9 But, behold, faith cometh not by signs, but ^asigns follow those that believe.

 10 Yea, ^asigns come by ^bfaith, not by the will of men, nor as they please, but by the will of God.

 11 Yea, signs come by faith, unto mighty works, for without ^afaithno man pleaseth God; and with whom God is ^bangry he is not well pleased; wherefore, unto such he showeth no signs, only in ^cwrathunto their ^dcondemnation.

 12 Wherefore, I, the Lord, am not pleased with those among you who have sought after signs and wonders for faith, and not for the good of men unto my glory.

 He wanted people to have "faith" not "fact".

so i stopped doing all my research, delete my blog,  delete everything because the Lord told me.

on Sunday,3rd February, it was the first Sunday of the month and it was testimonial Sunday. i was listening to people share their testimonies. i prayed to Heavenly Father again "Heavenly Father, if  i don't give the new investigators fact,but my faith, can i still teach them?"

His answer was "Yes" i felt it inside and i open the book of Mormon. the answer showed in D&C28:4-5

 4 And if thou art ^aled at any time by the Comforter to ^bspeak or teach, or at all times by the way of commandment unto the church, thou mayest do it.

 5 But thou shalt not write by way of ^acommandment, but by wisdom;

i can teach new investigators as long as i speak with the power of the Holy ghost. i was so happy. i had a lesson with the missionaries and investigator right after Church service.

i tried my best to not put the fact in the lesson with the elders, but then i still put the facts.... the elders told me that i know a lot. i was happy to hear the compliment, but it still was not good enough.

in the evening of the same day, i had another lesson with the other group of elders and i had share my testimony, my faith , not a fact. (read here -> how do i know there are Gods? )

it felt totally different.

i got home with one knowledge and i re-think about what the Lord answered me.

when i got baptise about 3 months ago. i had no almost nothing about Joseph Smith, or history of the LDS church, i read only few chapters of the book of Mormon. and i still have a lot of questions about the church and a lot of thing that i read from anti-Mormon documents. (i got baptised in only 3 weeks after i met the missionaries on the street. )

but there is one thing i know that was true, that make me agree to be baptise. i knew my feeling that i knew the church is true, the book of Mormon is true. i had "faith" not "fact"

i realised that it doesn't because of the more knowledge i know about Joseph smith or history of the church, or evident about place in the book of Mormon that make me believe in the church and feel closer to Gods.

it is because of my small prayer in everyday, reading the scriptures, serving him, and living the gospel life that i come to know that Heavenly Father is there ,and Jesus Christ and Holy ghost are true.

my faith isn't based on how much information i have , but how much i had change and how much i felt when i read the book of Mormon and how the Lord talked to me.

find all D&C --> Doctrine and Covenants